Interview with Pamela – Part II
Pamela is interviewed by Jan Marolt on the occasion of the publication of The Jeshua Channelings in Slovenian. The interview focuses on her personal journey and how she experiences her connection with Jeshua in everyday life. She also speaks more broadly about healing, inner growth, and the role of spiritual teachers
Question 5: Looking back, what would you say is the biggest difference between Pamela in the early 2000s and Pamela today, both spiritually and personally?
Personally, I’d say I’m more grounded now, more disillusioned — which I think is a good thing, because I used to be more naive and idealistic. That naivety did give me a sense of excitement, hope, and optimism, but that kind of excitement can be false, or an illusion. So I’m now more knowledgeable, more realistic, more grounded. That may sound a bit boring, but it actually feels really good.
A lot of things happened in the early 2000s. I started channeling in 2002, right after my daughter — my only child — was born. I had met Gerrit about a year or a year and a half before that, and our meeting led to a great deal of change, because it was the first time I had truly met a soulmate. Our coming together sparked an explosion of creativity.
Right after my daughter was born in 2002, I started channeling. It was as though her birth had somehow created a channel for me to become more grounded and able to receive spiritual information. I had always been very open in the higher chakras, but not very well grounded in the lower ones. Meeting Gerrit, and then our daughter being born a year later, seemed to create the right conditions for the spiritual work to begin — and it did so very quickly.
I received the first series of channelings from Jeshua, the Lightworker series, which became the book The Jeshua Channelings. I received it together with Gerrit in those early years. After I published it, nothing happened at first — and then it took off, attracting a great many people. That was very challenging for me, because I felt a lot of hesitation and fear about expressing myself as a channel. At the same time, starting to channel Jeshua and building up our practice was an incredible adventure, and I felt deeply fulfilled by it. So even though it was a mixture of joy and fear, I knew without a doubt that this was my soul’s path.
Sometimes I look back on those years with nostalgia — the feeling that miracles were happening, the excitement, so many things finally coming together. But there was also a great deal of insecurity in me. Now I feel more confident, more aware of who I am, what I can do, and what I cannot do. Because of my sensitivity, for example, there are many things I cannot do: I cannot work a great deal, I cannot go out and do things the way most people do — but I have now accepted this, and I no longer judge myself for it.
What I also appreciate about this stage of my life — I am now 57 — is that I feel myself detaching more, being less focused on the future, simply because there is less future left. The aging process can be wonderful, I think. There is a kind of natural ascension taking place. I sometimes have remarkable experiences — walking along the ocean, or through a beautiful forest — when my consciousness seems to become one with everything. I feel as though I am no longer quite human, and it is hard to describe in words, but it is very liberating. Sometimes I can see what it is like to be human from the perspective of the other side: how strange, and how strangely limiting, but also how adventurous it is to be in a human body. I can sense the miracle of it, but also its limitations. And it feels something like bliss to know that at some point I will be free of it, and will return to this feeling of not being captured in a single point in time and space — of being more free as consciousness.
In your question you distinguish between what has changed for me spiritually and personally. For me, the two are so intertwined that I truly do not know how to separate them. Perhaps — well, genuine spirituality means that you embody the knowledge or wisdom, not simply know it intellectually, but truly live it. That is the only thing that matters. And so I think that, through some severe ups and downs, I now know the truth of what Jeshua and Mary Magdalene channeled through me from the inside out. I have integrated it on an experiential level, and that is the most fulfilling thing of all.
Question 6: For someone who is still transitioning from ego consciousness to heart consciousness, how can they recognize and surround themselves with people who already embody that state more fully?
The first thing that strikes me about this question is that it seems to assume we have control over who we attract and surround ourselves with. To some extent we do, of course — but I think to a large extent we do not. We are surrounded by people: our birth families, colleagues, friends, people we meet in everyday life. I think the most basic thing is that we need to trust that we attract the people who are somehow meant to be in our lives, people who bring us both challenges and joy. It is usually a mixture of both. Everyone who is truly significant to you will tend to come as a package: you feel inspired by them, and yet the relationship also brings up difficult emotions and challenges.
I also believe — both from my own experience and from witnessing the struggles of many clients — that we tend to attract people of generally the same frequency as our own, particularly when those people are truly important to us: a partner, a spouse, close friends, people we spend a great deal of time with. Like attracts like; it is a law of energy. This may change over time, of course. But when you find yourself thinking, “This person has a much lower frequency than me — I cannot stand being around them,” there is usually some resonance, some similarity between the two of you, even if it relates only to a specific aspect of life that is important in that context.
If you truly want to surround yourself with people who more fully embody heart consciousness, the only way to do it is to more fully embody heart consciousness yourself. It always begins with yourself. And once you do this, you may find that you naturally step away from certain connections, relationships, and friendships. That is where you do have control. I said earlier that we often do not have control over who enters our lives — but once you consciously grow and take responsibility for your own frequency and state of mind, you may begin to say no to certain people and situations. You will eventually attract different people, though often in a miraculous way you cannot control with your mind. You can only govern your own state of awareness.
Question 7: Many seekers are looking for guidance and support. How can a person discern whether a spiritual teacher or guide they encounter is truly authentic and genuine?
A teacher or guide should be someone who embodies heart-based consciousness more fully than you — one or more steps ahead of you. Only then can they truly teach you something.
The simplest answer I can give is this: what do you feel in the presence of this person? When I first encountered Jeshua, the energy was so profound and so clear that I knew at once something special was happening. It even frightened me a little, because the presence was so strong — not in a way that evoked fear, but rather a sense of awe, of deep honesty, of absolute clarity. The problem with teachers and guides — both in human form and on the astral level, which I consider a kind of dense psychic dimension around the earth — is that both can use words and concepts that seem very wise and deep, and yet something may be missing: that quality of joy, of light, not in a fluffy or naive way, but in a combination of joyfulness, clarity, directness, and simplicity. I think those are the hallmarks of a real teacher or guide. A sense of humor is also a very good sign.
I also think you should ask yourself: why am I looking for a teacher or guide in the first place? I think it is natural to be inspired by a teacher for a time — temporarily — and then to move on along your own path. If you hold this perspective lightly, almost playfully, almost anything can truly inspire you. It doesn’t have to be a formal spiritual teacher, particularly one surrounded by an entire organization. I personally feel a little skeptical in such cases. But even a song on the radio, a film, or a great book can be a teacher.
Even the finest teachers were only embodying heart-based consciousness to a certain degree. They each have their own perspective, their own particular flavor of the truth, shaped by their own unique path. What they say may resonate with you deeply for a time, and that can be wonderful and genuinely helpful — but it is not the truth. It is the frequency of truth as it shines through them.
In short, my answer would be: trust your gut feeling about someone. Do not let yourself be too impressed by words, theories, or systems, and always remain true to your own sense of truth.
Question 8: What do you believe is the greatest contribution a single individual can bring to humanity and society at this point in time?
I think any individual, in any era of history, should focus on their own inner growth — which means facing their own darkness, so that at some point their soul’s light can shine through them. That is when they make their highest contribution to humanity.
Serving the world and serving yourself — with a capital Y — are ultimately the same thing. When you transition from ego to heart-based consciousness, you reach a higher state of awareness, and this will naturally affect the world and the people around you. But that should not be your primary goal. Your primary goal should be to tend to your own inner life. In truth, you are not really able to clean up anyone else’s mess — let alone the mess of the whole world — if you have not first tended to your own.
Your highest contribution is always your own unique light, your own unique flavor of the truth. You can only channel it into the world when you have truly gone within and faced your emotional issues: trauma, pain, the feeling of being a victim, rage, resistance, distrust, fear. All of these must be faced, and your willingness to face them will already begin to change you. You enter heart-based consciousness when you are willing to honestly and openly face your own darkness, because in doing so you are allowing in love and compassion, and your frequency will rise as a result.
So you do not have to be perfect. You do not have to be a perpetually peaceful and smiling human being in order to contribute something meaningful to humanity. You can be fully human. And yet the awakened heart will naturally want to attend to its own blind spots. Gradually, a natural desire will arise in your heart to share your light, your wisdom, your joy, your love — with other people, with the earth, with humanity. It will not be an ego-driven desire, not “I need to change the world” or “we have to finally make progress.” There will be none of that warrior attitude, which is so often quite judgmental and moralistic. Instead, there will simply be a natural joy that arises when you truly speak and act from the heart. It will touch other people, even when you do not know it — and it will feel like being yourself.
That phrase is often used and has become something of a cliché, but this is your highest contribution: to be yourself, to be fully human. And precisely because you accept and know this, you will simultaneously be fully divine.
For me, my work — the channeling, the writing, leading workshops — is at this point in my life the highest expression of my soul’s energy. And at the same time, I am a very imperfect human being, still in the process of embodying heart-based consciousness. But this is my highest contribution right now.
Everyone has a highest contribution, and you do not have to see it as something far off in the future. It is right here, right now. You do not have to be perfect. There is already heart-based awareness inside you, I am certain of it, and it already touches other people. This is how change comes about — through ordinary human beings. Little drops of light spread out and reach other human beings. Even small acts of kindness, or simply being genuinely warm toward someone, are a beautiful and worthy contribution.
© Pamela Kribbe
